Wednesday, March 18, 2015

The Best Yes

Are you a people pleaser? Is is tempting to say yes to requests just to get the person making the request off your back?  I have to say that I am guilty as charged. As a younger Christian this was a real problem for me. I just hated saying NO to people.  But as I have matured as a Christian, I realize that I am just not equipped for some tasks. And I might be standing in the way of another Christian who God wants for that job! This book is a really good read on making wise decisions. One of the things I like about Lysa TerKeurst's writing is that she tells it like it is, even if it means admitting her own failures to make a point. ( I just hate reading books by know it alls, don't you?:))

There were many quotes in this book that hit me where I live!! In fact I am thinking of purchasing this book( I borrowed my copy from the library).  One of the funnier quotes is this...Saying yes all the time won't make me a Wonder Woman. It will make me a Worn Out Woman.  But it is true...saying yes to any and everything can cause a lot of craziness and defeat in your life. She gave the example of the room mother finding you in the car line and asking you to make 45 Rice Krispie Treats for TOMORROW. You have no ingredients at home to make this, you run to the store, get home, try to get supper done, one of the children opens the box of Rice Krispies and promptly spills them on the know the drill. I think we have all been there and have lost our tempers over such an experience. When you should have said, "No, but I will be glad to contribute something I have on hand." Of course now days you can run to the store and buy these treats ready made!!  And if the room mom does not like it, she can find someone else to make Rice Krispie Treats. It is not being Mean but realizing that perfection is not here in this life!

Another quote ....The space between our expectations and our reality is a fertile field and it is the perfect place to grow a bumper crop of disappointment. Oh how true this is. We must know and accept our limitations while embracing our strengths!

And the last several chapters really caused me to shed some tears. What happens when my best yes does not yield what I expect?  One of the examples was children. You invest your best yes in them and yet they walk away from the faith?  I know about this personally. As a mother we tend to blame ourselves for this kind of disappointment.  Lysa  shared this thought that really helped me...Let this unexpected happening point to your strength and not your weakness.Maybe you have been entrusted with this and not cursed with it.   That gave me something to ponder on!

And we should not say NO all the time, we just need to use wisdom in knowing where God wants us to serve him.   I find when I have said Yes to the right positions of serving God, I look forward to these jobs, not dreading them!   So if you need help in this area, I hope you will read The Best Yes. I think you will find it very helpful!


Anonymous said...

Sounds like a good read. Hope you have a good evening.

Terri D said...

Excellent advise. I learned a few years ago to say no. The more you say it, the easier it gets. Sounds like a good book, that will help you know when to say no, but also when to say yes.

~Lavender Dreamer~ said...

I'll look for this book. I've gotten better over the years but when my kids were growing up...I did WAY too much too often. Sweet hugs, Diane

Arlene Grimm said...

Friends, I think we all are tempted to say yes when we should say a gentle no. Someone once told me that if I said yes to everything that I was keeping someone else from a blessing. Gave me a whole new perspective.

Tori Leslie said...

I love all her witty sayings and I bet the book is a great read. I also have a problem saying no, not as much as before but I'm naturally a people-pleaser. Our preacher preached on knowing your gifts and talents and your weaknesses and not trying to be something you aren't and that helped me a lot. Anyhoo, thanks friend for the review, looks like a good one!

Arlene Grimm said...

Tori, I was in that boat for many years but I think as I have matured I can see the bigger picture and I know if I can or cannot fulfill an obligation. I have the Curse of the Competent, which you do not see much anymore. If I say I will do something, I do